Okay, hi guys. Hope you are all good, hope you are all well. So the other day, my car was at the shop and so my boss offered me a lift home. He backed out of the car-park slowly and stopped for me to get in. All jolly and happy, I entered and closed the door. Okay, no, honestly I kinda banged the door shut earning myself a look from my boss. He arched an eyebrow and goes on to ask, “Don’t you know the rules of how to behave when you are offered a lift?” I answered with silence and so he went on to school me

Rule #1 Do not slam the door… oops

“When you enter someone’s car, close the door as gently as you can.
It’s best that the driver be the one to tell you to swing it just a little harder in case it does not close. But don’t go around banging people’s doors. It’s considered rude. And you might never know, maybe all that door needed was a good bang to finally come loose!”

Rule #2 Do not talk before you are talked to…

So there I was, apologizing about the door and going further to find a way to start a random conversation. Weather; hard day at work; that pending report? Well apparently I shouldn’t have.

“Ssshhh, you shouldn’t really speak until spoken to. You know, some people prefer some peace and quiet in their cars, others might like listening to music. If they want to talk, let them start the conversation. This way you avoid the awkward topics. You actually think people like talking about the weather, really?”

Rule #3 Do not touch their radio…

my badOh so my boss prefers to listen to music when he is on the road, I thought to myself. I smiled happily as I reached to his radio and turned the dial. “What’s your favorite station?” I asked. I thought I was doing him a favor, he had to keep his eyes on the road and stuff, but actually…

“Did you just touch my radio? Never touch people’s radios! If anything is off limits in someone’s car, it’s their radio. How can you not know that?”

Rule #4 Do not compliment any other car on the road…

You can imagine, we sat there quietly for a while before he actually decided to turn on his radio. Choice fm, exactly the station that I would have put. So anyway, we are at a red light at a junction. What else can I do other than stare out the window. Then my eye catches this beautiful, sleek, pitch black Range Rover Sport 2016. Who could resist admiring such perfection? I HAD to say something, “Check that beast out!”

My boss lets out a sigh. I thought he was with me on this one….yet

“Are you trying to never get a lift from me ever again? Never compliment any other car when you are offered a lift. Not the one behind you, not the one beside you and definitely not the one in front of you. The driver knows therAnnoyede are better cars than his, why do you want to be mean and point it out? I ought to let you down right here, see if you can catch a ride with your beast.

Rule #5 Contribute…to the traffic fine

When the lights turned green and we were allowed to drive on we were immediately pulled over by the traffic police. Random traffic inspections are routine in some countries, sometimes way too often. I was calm, everything seemed to be in order to me. Unfortunately, this was not quite true. While I had remembered to put on my seat-belt #safetyfirst, my boss had not and this was the reason we were pulled over. He got out of the vehicle, paid his fine and was receipted. Back in the car, all I could say was

rea“I’m sorry about that.” I was being considerate, right?

Well..

“I know this was not your fault and everything but you could help a brother out you know. Since they are doing you a solid, giving you a ride. A little top up is more appreciated than an empty ‘sorry'”

At this point, I was done! Bruh, I was all up in my phone trying to figure out how this Uber service works! These rules were a bit too much, some yeah I can understand that when you are in someone’s personal space you have to be a bit sensitive but that last one? When did life become so complicated? It was just a lift guys, shish. But anyway, I guess you learn something new everyday. I learnt to never accept a lift from my boss ever again 😉