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It's About Life…..and What I Think….

Things I Learnt from Cartoons!

Hi people. Hope you are all good. Hope you are all well. Today, I would like to take you on a trip down memory lane. I was arguing with my Aunt just last week. She was telling me not to let my daughter watch too much cartoons. My daughter is just 4 years old, what am I suppose to let her watch? The Fate of the Furious? Cartoons paved my childhood, I loved them and still do. Yes, I am a grown woman who still loves watching cartoons occasionally. I went on and pointed out things that children learn from cartoons. I mentioned a whole bunch to her, such as the ones below….

# 1 JOHNNY BRAVO

“Heeeey, pretty momma!!”

What could you probably learn from Johnny you ask? Well he was the most confident cartoon I have ever known. He taught me to always believe in myself regardless of what the odds are. He always got up and continued moving no matter how many times he was slapped or punched. Confidence is such an important characteristic in this day and age and I would want my daughter to have that. As I remember, he also taught me to raise that single eyebrow. He was awesome!

#2 MIKE, LU AND OG

This was such a cute cartoon for me. I used to find the obsession with the Juju balls hilarious. I learnt the value and acceptance of culture. Mike was taken to a whole new world, with a different people. Away from everything that she was used to. But she made friends in her new community. She learnt of their ways and their customs and she felt right at home. The world is full of people with different cultures, traditions and beliefs. Each group of people is just as beautiful as the next. Lu and Og were also very accommodating to Mike and accepting her as a friend. Well, maybe Og more than Lu.

#3 COURAGE THE COWARDLY DOG

Now this little pup was a life saver. He would always save either Muriel or Eustace or both. Yes, you could always see that this dog was scared, and trembled to the core but he would amazingly always sum up the courage to save people. He faced aliens, robots, weird strangers and French Speaking ducks. With courage, we can face and conquer all our fears and all that is holding us back from moving forward. With courage comes the strength that will fuel your journey. Just like how Courage always made it, you can make it too. He proved that its okay to be scared, but as people watch you quiver with fear, let them also watch you take the first step with courage!!

#4 COW AND CHICKEN

Mummy had a chicken, daddy had a cow! Hahahaha, what are the odds of two perfectly normal human beings having a cow and a chicken for kids? I don’t know, but all I know, all I remember is how happy this family was. Regardless of how cow and chicken were all kinds of different they still cared and loved each other. So we need to know that, siblings and parents may not always compliment each other and we all know that all families have their imperfections. We must just always learn to love our parents and siblings regardless of how different they are from us. Family is life…..cousin Boneless and all.

#5 DEXTER’S LABORATORY 

Yep, this little short nerdy kid taught me to embrace your talent regardless of how other people will look at you. He loved science and had the neck for inventing things. He didn’t care about what DeeDee or anybody else said. So if you are a brother who can cook incredible meals, or a lady that can lift the weight of the world, so be it. Have the confidence to see where your talent can take you. Do not let anyone tell you that it is lame; it is useless or it is nerdy. These are just people and that is what people do. You might never know, deep down they may be jealous of you.

#6 SCOOBY DOO

The monsters are always just people. Yes, I paid attention and saw it like it is. Every single time the monster was just a person. A person that has set out to sabotage you. It is a person trying to slow you down or scare you away. Envious people will do anything to see you fail. Trust me people can go to extreme measures. And no, in reality they do not wear costumes or masks. They just smile in your face while they go behind your back and plot against you. That is how people can be heartless sometimes. These monsters are not strangers. They are always people you know and people who know you. Family members, friends, neighbors you name it. They pretend to to care but yet throw daggers at you the moment your back is turned. Learn to read people and try to chose who you associate with wisely.

Well, those are my lessons from a few. I think my baby will be watching cartoons as much as she wishes because I know she is learning.

For the next time I’m offered a lift..*Rules I never knew existed* ^^,

Okay, hi guys. Hope you are all good, hope you are all well. So the other day, my car was at the shop and so my boss offered me a lift home. He backed out of the car-park slowly and stopped for me to get in. All jolly and happy, I entered and closed the door. Okay, no, honestly I kinda banged the door shut earning myself a look from my boss. He arched an eyebrow and goes on to ask, “Don’t you know the rules of how to behave when you are offered a lift?” I answered with silence and so he went on to school me

Rule #1 Do not slam the door… oops

“When you enter someone’s car, close the door as gently as you can.
It’s best that the driver be the one to tell you to swing it just a little harder in case it does not close. But don’t go around banging people’s doors. It’s considered rude. And you might never know, maybe all that door needed was a good bang to finally come loose!”

Rule #2 Do not talk before you are talked to…

So there I was, apologizing about the door and going further to find a way to start a random conversation. Weather; hard day at work; that pending report? Well apparently I shouldn’t have.

“Ssshhh, you shouldn’t really speak until spoken to. You know, some people prefer some peace and quiet in their cars, others might like listening to music. If they want to talk, let them start the conversation. This way you avoid the awkward topics. You actually think people like talking about the weather, really?”

Rule #3 Do not touch their radio…

my badOh so my boss prefers to listen to music when he is on the road, I thought to myself. I smiled happily as I reached to his radio and turned the dial. “What’s your favorite station?” I asked. I thought I was doing him a favor, he had to keep his eyes on the road and stuff, but actually…

“Did you just touch my radio? Never touch people’s radios! If anything is off limits in someone’s car, it’s their radio. How can you not know that?”

Rule #4 Do not compliment any other car on the road…

You can imagine, we sat there quietly for a while before he actually decided to turn on his radio. Choice fm, exactly the station that I would have put. So anyway, we are at a red light at a junction. What else can I do other than stare out the window. Then my eye catches this beautiful, sleek, pitch black Range Rover Sport 2016. Who could resist admiring such perfection? I HAD to say something, “Check that beast out!”

My boss lets out a sigh. I thought he was with me on this one….yet

“Are you trying to never get a lift from me ever again? Never compliment any other car when you are offered a lift. Not the one behind you, not the one beside you and definitely not the one in front of you. The driver knows therAnnoyede are better cars than his, why do you want to be mean and point it out? I ought to let you down right here, see if you can catch a ride with your beast.

Rule #5 Contribute…to the traffic fine

When the lights turned green and we were allowed to drive on we were immediately pulled over by the traffic police. Random traffic inspections are routine in some countries, sometimes way too often. I was calm, everything seemed to be in order to me. Unfortunately, this was not quite true. While I had remembered to put on my seat-belt #safetyfirst, my boss had not and this was the reason we were pulled over. He got out of the vehicle, paid his fine and was receipted. Back in the car, all I could say was

rea“I’m sorry about that.” I was being considerate, right?

Well..

“I know this was not your fault and everything but you could help a brother out you know. Since they are doing you a solid, giving you a ride. A little top up is more appreciated than an empty ‘sorry'”

At this point, I was done! Bruh, I was all up in my phone trying to figure out how this Uber service works! These rules were a bit too much, some yeah I can understand that when you are in someone’s personal space you have to be a bit sensitive but that last one? When did life become so complicated? It was just a lift guys, shish. But anyway, I guess you learn something new everyday. I learnt to never accept a lift from my boss ever again 😉

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Guide: How to spot a Fake Friend

fake

So into the new year, I thought to myself, “There are so many people i am forcing myself to stay in touch with”. Why the heck I did it, I don’t really know, perhaps I did not want to lose my ‘friends’ *cough*. It took so much effort for some gals that I was like ‘hell no’  friendships don’t have to be this hard. Maintaining a friendship is not supposed to be a workout, having you all sweaty and stuff. It’s supposed to be natural, smooth sailing, fun and happiness. So if it’s cracking your back, then there is a problem, who ever it is you are fighting for is not a friend. I have decided that this year I am letting go all of my fake friends. How do I know they are fake, well um I got 366 days of 2016 of experience so I know.  Let me school you

 REAL FRIENDS VS FAKE FRIENDS

HONESTY:

Real friends will always 99.9% be honest with you and tell you the truth. The only time that they might lie to you is to save your life hence the 0.01%. It can be on small things such as “Do I look fat in this dress?” or “Do you think I should pierce my tongue?” you know. But it can also be something serious like “How do you feel about by new man?” or “I got a new job offer at so and so, do you think I should take it?”. Real friends keep it real, even if the truth hurts like hell. If your man is a player they will tell you. If you wronged someone, they will tell you that you were on the wrong.

Fake friends on the other hand, they respond either yes or no to all questions. Most of the time its just head shaking and nodding, not even words. No matter how serious it is, they couldn’t care less and might respond without thinking things through. They are quite comfortable watching you make the wrong decision. They can let you go out in public looking like a clown in a hot mess or let you sell your soul to the devil. With friends like these, even your inner voice always tells you to seek a second opinion.

RELIANCE:

Real friends are people you can rely on at any time. Be it night or day, sun or rain, they got your back. These friends can offer you a place to stay for as long as you would like even if they have a one bedroom apartment. You can count on them to babysit for you while you rush to that exam hall. Sometimes you can feel like you take advantage of them because they come through for you in any situation, you should be grateful for them course when they say that they are one call away they actually mean it. They offer you a shoulder to cry on when the going gets tough and they become that strength that keeps you going. You can rely on them to always offer that encouragement to pick yourself up, usually in the form of a tongue lashing, talk about tough love. So when you were drunk and you needed a ride home and they came for you, that’s a keeper. Or you wanted that beautiful black number but your cheque was late and they borrowed you money, that’s a keeper. When you wanted to give up and they told you to stop feeling sorry for yourself and be more proactive, that’s a keeper.

fk frThen come the fake ones. Fake friends will always tell you they are on their but will never show up. They always have something more important to do (probably out with their other friends), meaning they couldn’t careless if you are sick at work and needed someone to take you to the hospital. They would rather go to the salon while you die. Fake friends are the excuse factory. And that one time that they do actually come through for you, they will never stop whining about it. As a matter of fact, this is something that you will definitely have to pay for sometime in the future. They don’t do favors, they invest. They know, and will actually be looking for ways that you are going to pay them back. It’s such a shame really, you do not want to have this “friend” on your speed dial.

ACCEPTANCE:

Real friends know all your flaws in and out and still have mad love for you. They don’t care if you are a certain weight, they don’t care if you are a certain height, skin color, religion, ethnicity etc. They have come to love you for you and never complain about you. They only try to make you better for the short-coming that you may have, and these are usually those nasty habits such as laziness, self-conscientiousness, over-confidence. But all the while they still deal with you if you don’t necessarily change. I love having friends that are in love with my mind, body and soul….and all that other baggage in between.

Fake friends, *facepalms*, they pick you apart at every chance that they get. loyThey strip you of any confidence and self acceptance that you might have and leave you bitter in the cold! I had a friend once that kept telling my how fat I was….when I was pregnant! I had to put up with them for 9 months! Then she kept telling me to start wearing long sleeves and tings because i was getting darker than I already was. Wow, it’s like all day every day, it was her life mission to point out my flaws and imperfections. It was not long till I let that ship go….and no, not sail away and risk it making its way back to me for some reason, no, I let that ish sink!

LOVE

Lastly, a true friend will somewhere, someday in your silly, crazy escapades utter the words I love you. And you will know that they mean it too. When you go through your Facebook pics of the two of you and you smile and laugh at their crazy comments, that is love right there. Its love when your parents act like they have 1 or 2 extra children lol.

The fake ones, hmmmm, I even get sad thinking about it. What can I say, all the people I took out of my friendship circle have never really cared. Not once did they even say, “Hey you know, I really like your silly butt!”. Like really? You can just tell there is no love and most of the time they are there for a certain thing, popularity, money, you are their pass ticket in university? Or you have a great job! Fake quitting and you will see true colors!

Well, that’s about it. I know everyone has had some of these fake people sometime in their lives. Lol, I just you were never one. I have learnt that it’s not a sin to cut loose the excess baggage, its actually healthy for you! It lets you continue life knowing you are surrounded by the people who deserve your company and those that will always make your life much much

better.

At least that’s what I think….

Co-Workers from Hell

coHi guys. Hope you are all well. Now I think by now y’all already now me well and how I write only about my true experience. It could be mine personally or from my family members. So when we get jobs, we usually have this vision where every thing and everyone is just perfect. You to work with a smile and leave with a smile. Sadly, that is a reality to very, and I mean very few people, the number is almost negligible. You meet characters at the office bruh, and from that you can clearly see whether your life at work is going to be a comedy, drama, or horror movie. These are the characters I star with…..still not sure of the genre of my movie though

  1. Deskmate=BFFs co-worker

I share a desk with a lady at work and from day one she has somehow assumed that since we share a desk were are automatically buddies. She follows me to lunch, to the bathroom, she shares her tofu sandwiches with me….everyday. I think it sweetish but its borderline creepy. When she starts asking about the outfit i will wear to work the next day so we can match, or escorting me home when she lives all the way across town from me. *Cough Cough* Its time for me to get a personal desk.

2. Whining Wendy

The co-worker that is NEVER happy about anything in life. She just whines and whines and whines until your ears bleed. If you hang around with them long enough you may just catch the Whining bug too and become depressed. whineIts their awful spouse, their unappreciative children, their unanswered prayers, their two timing friends! Well, dah, no one wants to be around a whiner! Its their low salary, their long hours of work, them not getting laid!! I don’t wanna hear that crap! I got my own load to deal with but I chose to suffer in silence. hell, if I let it all out people be starting a charity fund just for me. Repel this co-worker like a sour fruit.

3. Charming Chandler aka the user.

 Yep you know him. The one guy that flashes his perfect pearly white teeth at you and you are ready to sell your kidney for him. He uses his charms and looks to get sweet old people like you to do all the work for him. At the end of the day his work load is at -50 coz you felt sincere enough to help him with today’s and tomorrow’s workload. And your situation?? Let’s just say your somewhere between carrying your work home or staying at the office till morning?ch It sucks!! Like you constantly ask yourself is he genuinely very persuasive and sleek …or is he using some kind of witchcraft? Listen, here’s a trick for you, when he comes by to your desk and he flashes his perfect smile at you turn your head to the right, turn your head to the left, and turn your head to the right again. And repeat until he goes away. Remember to have your eyes closed all this time coz you need to remain strong. Looking into his pool of blue eyes will not help!

4. Invisible Amy. 

Hahahaha have you ever had a staff meeting and the boss asks if everyone is there, people do a quick head count and y’all confidently reply “yes”. Then the door squeaks and in comes the one colleague that people always forget about. They are always super quiet and have their desks at a far corner of the office. You practically never hear their voices and they are constantly having their heads down. Why?? They are super timid its unhealthy. Invisible Amys need a boost in self confidence and just genuine welcoming smile. This will straight up take care of their invisibility syndrome.

5. Boss’s pet aka Snitchsn

That one person that is always favoured by the boss even if they do…… absolutely nothing. These people can be so annoying! They know that they can get away with anything since they have the big boss on their side. They feel like they should be called boss #2 or something. Irritating little people. Usually they have nothing better to do than dig for office drama and gossip and play the snitch. No one wants to ever be around these people, but when they are they have on the most fake pasted smile. The good side is that it’s a workplace and people need to speak out whenever they feel uncomfortable. So when the snitch comes along, you have a the right to tell it like it is, you don’t appreciate their attitude and the only time you may talk to them is when it is absolutely necessary. If not they should just respect your space.

So these are the types of guys that I personally have to be around for most part of the week. Sometimes its easy but sometimes I feel like just walking out like they do in the movies. In the end all I usually do is have a woosah moment and then treat myself to a nice looooong lunch. I believe that everyone can learn to get along better once we know each others attitudes and behaviors. Which co-workers do you face at work on the daily? 

FACEBOOK MAMAS. . .

 

mom 1

Hi guys!  Today I would like to introduce you to the different mummys on Facebook! Yes, our beloved mothers that are into the social media frenzy…..some a little more than others. There are many kinds of different mums on FB and I thought just to categorize them a bit to see on which group my own mamito falls into. I know both our moms and dads are on there but my perceptions tell me there are more moms than dads. So these are the types of Mamas that I have come across.

WannaBe BFF Mama– the type of mama that gives herself the best friend role to her daughter.  She will be liking all your pictures, posting pictures of you and her together, you know, the ones you look fab in ….and the ones you don’t. You can even let her take over the Throw Back Thursday posts for you because she got plenty to share. She will never let anyone bully you or annoy you on FB! She will tear them down and make sure they never much as peek at your wall again. Sometimes it can be suffocating and embarrassing when she friend requests all your friends too. This is the sorta mama that we ignore at times and absolutely love sometimes

Paranoia Mama– the mama that believes that all social media is Satan’s playground. She believes that every person that sends you a friend request is either a stalker, pedophile, serial killer or all the above. momShe has trust issues with all the unfamiliar faces that pop up on your posts and pictures that she does not know. It can be really difficult to explain to her that if one takes the right precautions Facebook is pretty safe. With this mom, be ready to take taekwondo classes and get Mace with all your Christmas and birthday presents throughout the year. She trusts no one and that ain’t going to change anytime soon.

I-can-be-17-again-mama– Yoh, I know y’all know what I am talking about. I am talking about the situations where your friends can’t tell the difference between you and your mom! She is all up in FB doing exactly if not more than what you are doing. Gossiping and posting funny GIFs or memes, posting bathroom selfies; using that slang like WTF or YOLO! I mean, Facebook is not a time portal people. You have to unfortunately act your age. Not cool mama, not cool.

Another-platform-to-discipline-you mama– Constant curses and screams is all you get from this one. It’s like she doesn’t believe actual face to face conversations anymore and instead takes to FB to yell at you and call you out. And she does this in the middle of the most random post. Like I mean, you couldn’t just tell me to take out the trash in person? Heck you could have even texted me but no, you had to put me on glass so that all my FB friends would know I forgot to do my chore? Really ma? Not cool.

mama

I’m-not-here mama– Yep the invisible one, the one mom most people would wish to have. She is never all up in your wall and harassing your friend requesters. She is simply invisible. She takes to her own life on Facebook and interacts with only her own social circle. She stays clear off your radar and you barely notice she is there.  But tread softly because we all know she is up in there reading all your posts and stuff cause yeah she is a mom. Some call it giving you your own space, but others might say that it would be nice to share a photo or poke each other once in a while. C’mon ma, we can share the spotlight….as long as you don’t shine too much.

Perfect FB Mama– The mom we all wish we could have. She is like a normal Facebook user. She does the normal FB things. She comments, likes, shares tags you normally, just like how any of your sisters or friends might, (well not exactly exactly). fb momBut this mama never embarrasses you intentionally; she supports your positive statuses and has all your friends wishing they had a mom like yours. A mama that actually knows how to private message you when she sees or reads something she does not approve of. She is the coolest and the best and has the hang of what Facebook really means.

With all the above, I think it’s safe to guess where your mummy falls under. But regardless of her FB class, we still love them unconditionally. They may not be Facebook savvy but they sure got the hang of being a treasure to all of us! Love all the mamas out there…xoxo

 

WHEN BITCHINESS IS INVERSELY PROPORTIONAL TO BEAUTY..

prettyHi guys, let me teach you a new thing I discovered. ‘Did you know that your level of bitchiness is inversely proportional to your beauty when you have Brazilian weaves,  foundation and Chanel perfumes and other material things as constants?’ In simpler terms “The nastier your attitude, the uglier you get”. I know some time somewhere you might have experienced this equation in person. Remember that time when you saw this beautiful lady walking along the street? She was like a goddess…until you bumped into her by accident and she opened her foul mouth and started spitting out venom! For me, in such situations, people turn from the beautiful Tyra Banks to the Grinch in nano seconds. When she starts hauling out those curses and sneering at you, admit it you see beyond her fake lashes and butt and see her like she truly is…UGLY.       

           = pretty 1    ugly 2

 

 

 

 

It is sad that this happens so often, I meet ugly people everyday! I met one just last week, at a client’s office. She was at the front desk. My first vision, Christina Milian look-a-like with her perfect brows, her glossy lips and maxi dress. Until I asked for assistance! Just an innocent smile and polite hello turned her into one of the oaks from The lord of the Rings!

pretty two

=ugly 3

 

 

She clicked her tongue and rolled her eyes at me while giving me the visitors’ book to sign! Why? What did I do? It’s your job to attend to me, isn’t it? Really guys, just because you are caked in makeup and dressed in killer outfits it will not hide your true ugliness. It is not sufficient to suppress all your nastiness and funky attitudes. The moment people are like

WTF

know that you have successfully revealed the dragon underneath all that MAC concealer and “Dollypink” powder blush! Some ladies then go ahead and start straightening their wigs and applying their gloss and I am like “You don’t need more makeup! You need to google for your nearest Exorcist or something cause the way your face contorted right now just ain’t right!”

*Sigh* The only solution is to be beautiful inside and out. Then you will see, that sometimes you don’t even need the makeup and all that glitters and gold. Your inner beauty will radiate all the way to the outside.All the material things will just be adding an extra sometimes not necessary oomph! Well, at least that is what LadyChi thinks. You?

SIMPLE BUT FUN CHRISTMAS GAMES

It’s Finally Here!!!!

Xmas logo

It is that festive time of the year to reflect, appreciate, accept and march ahead.

REFLECT on the events that made your year. How the year started, how you grew and changed and if you accomplished what you had hoped you would.

APPRECIATE all your successes.  Everything you achieved. All the times you laughed, smiled, kissed or hugged someone, got patted on the back. Be grateful and say thank you. Give back to the community or some random acts of kindness. Try to remain in the good books to set you off into the new year.

ACCEPT your failure and critics and all the bad things that happened. I know you screamed in anger, cried your lungs out, locked yourself in your room, beat the daylights out of someone, whatever went wrong, accept that sh*t. No one has a perfect life. The struggle is real. We learn from challenges and become better people.

And Finally….Rock on into the New Year!!!!

Xmas 1

Christmas is meant to be a festive and joyous time; a final chance to end the year in good spirits. I shall share a few games that will cost you as little as zero pennies but will ensure much laughter and cheer during the holidays. It is a wise way to save more money on decent presents for friends and family and not necessarily on entertainment.

So here are three games that definitely add that magic touch to the Christmas cheer.

  1. Who’s wearing Santa’s hat?Santas Hat

This is a silly beyond silly game but it is awesome and super fun! All you need is a Santa hat. All you do is place it over one top corner of the television. Once this is done, all you have to do is to look out for when someone on the screen appears to be wearing the hat. Every time this happens, you can choose to cheer in different ways. For example, if you are a couple playing this game, every time you see someone wearing the hat you may kiss! If you are a bunch of jolly friends, you can choose to have shots instead. For family fun though, you can opt to share a candy cane or simply just a round of hugs. This game can be played for a day, a week or the whole holiday.

Recap of items required: 1 Santa hat

2 . A whole lot of liquor……or love.

  1. Dirty Santa

In this game, all players need to bring a wrapped gift to the party. Make sure that the gift is wrapped in such a way that nobody can guess what it is e.g. in a box. These gifts can be placed under the tree like normal gifts. Next, a person writes down numbers (according to number of the group) and places them in a bowl…folded and mixes well. Every player draws a paper. The player with the number 1 gets to pick a present first. The person with the number two is next to pick a gift. However #2  can either choose a gift from under the tree or steal the gift from the first person. And so the game continues, meaning that the last person can steal a gift from any of the other players. But if a gift is stolen three times, it has to be removed from the game. The game is more fun when the gifts are outrageously ridiculous! So go out and buy your worst. Have fun!

Recap: Needed items: 1. A wack present from everyone

Paper and a bowl

Xmas 23. Cheers to that!

Now we all know that nothing completes Christmas like a good old Christmas movie!! We have How the Grinch stole Christmas, A Christmas Carol, Elf and the list goes on. The game is simple, when the family and friends are all snuggled in to watch a beautiful movie, you decide on a word or phrase or action that every time you see or hear it, you have a cheers moment. Of course, if it is just the adults you can have glasses of beer or eggnog and wine. If there are children in the picture, then you can have juices. So for example, if you choose to watch the classic Home Alone movie, you could choose to have a “cheers moment” every time a bad guy has an accident. Or it could be every time you hear a Christmas song…its absolutely up to you.

Recap: Needed items: A good old classic Christmas movie 😉

So those are three games from me that won’t cost you much but will lighten your holiday spirits. Hope you have fun!! For more games and fun stuff just click HERE

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

 

5 CHEATERS YOU MAY FORGIVE…AND….5 CHEATERS TO NEVER GIVE THE TIME OF DAY …OR NIGHT AGAIN!!

Cheat

Cheater: A person that acts dishonestly or unfairly to gain an advantage: informal be sexually unfaithful according to the online Oxford Dictionaries.  Just sexually unfaithful? Well maybe for some people…but as for me; no flirting with, no texting especially sexting, no kissing! I don’t care if there was no tongue action, booboo I don’t care if you didn’t open your mouth, hell it could have been a peck on the lips, it is still cheating to me. No e-mailing, no getting cozy and role playing on Facebook or any other social platform. No reminiscing old times with an ex! No giving some strange random girl a shoulder to cry on.  And trust me my list goes on and on and on, I be like Angela from Why Did I Get Married Too, she explains it all too well.

People have many reasons as to why they chose to step out on their partners and whether they are worth forgiving is debatable. From my own personal experience as well as close friends around me I have been able to categorize a list of different types of cheaters. In my books, I have separated then into two groups Cheater you MAY forgive and Cheaters to NEVER forgive. All this according to what LadyChi thinks. Do you agree?

Those you MAY Forgive

  1. Drunken cheater – if he ain’t an alcoholic and he barely gets tipsy on nights that he goes out with friends then there is more to this situation. So many explanations as to why he went past his usual drinking limit and this may be the cause of his odd behavior. It can even be that some of his dudes thought he was more fun if he was a little bit high and spiked his drink. Then things got wild and before he had his head straight, he was in a big mess. Whatever the reason may be, when he comes home and is man enough to tell you what happened or you find out somehow and he begs you for forgiveness. Maybe . . . just maybe you may forgive him. Then you can go ahead and find out what caused the out of character behavior.  I know some guys will use alcohol as an excuse to cheat but ladies I know you know your man, so I know you will now when he is being straight with you.
  2. No-action-in-the-bedroom cheater – Ladies it is no secret that you have to hold your man down or else he is going to seek that comfort elsewhere. You can be holding out on him for certain reasons known to you, but everyone needs a bit of intimacy, and from what I think, men more than women. It could be that you are tired all the time from work or you had a huge fight and he is on punishment. Don’t make it a long one and make an effort to squeeze the last ounce of energy from your reserves so you can enjoy a night with your man. Cause when your bedroom becomes a freezer he is going to look for warmth somewhere else. When this happens and you can admit that he cheated because it was your fault, it doesn’t really justify what he did but it sure made it easier for him. You may forgive this one and learn how to spice up you love life and keep your man happy.
  3. The-80/20-rule-really-exists cheater- This one is the one that so clearly knows his has made a mistake. He went chasing down someone who seemingly looked better than you. He thought he was going to have more than what he has at home but as a matter of fact, it is way, way, way less. So his theory was a big flop and he has most definitely learnt that what he already has is by far everything that he could possibly ever want and need. He has had to learn the hard way to appreciate you more. I think this one you may forgive as well. I don’t think he will want to take the gamble ever again. He will treasure what he has and salute the 80/20 rule.
  4. The-long-term-committed cheater- 10 years down the drain? What about the kids? He is your high school sweetheart? If you have been with this guy for some time (and his none of the below suckers) and this happens, sometimes it is not wise to break it off in such emotional panic. A lot changes over time and most people let their relationships lose that exciting spark. They fall into a life of mundane and routine and frankly boredom. As the no action in the bedroom cheater, your man will look for excitement somewhere else. But if you two still truly love each other and if the guy is willing to fight for you and repent his sins, begs for forgiveness and vows to spend the rest of his life making it up to you, then you may just be able to forgive this one. I am almost certain there is something worth fighting for. Y’all probably need a family vacation and definitely need to renew your vows. Do something fun and romantic to remind yourselves why you are still together after many years of life’s curve-balls.
  5. The-first-time-offender cheater – he might have stepped out on you for various reasons, for lack of rational thinking perhaps. If he does not fall in any of the below categories, sit and talk to your man. You may choose to forgive this one if his first time . . . will be his last time. And if you make the warning firm enough, I think he will be a good boy and behave. I think there is a first time for everything and committing a mistake is not a mistake….the mistake is repeating the mistake (did I say that right? Direct quote from Swahili…kosa si kutenda kosa, kosa ni kurudia kosa)

Given that none of the above cheater fall into the groups below, I think they may be worth forgiving  and working it out…

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Forget

  1. Your-best friend/sister/mother is-hotter-than-you cheater- kick this one to the curb. He clearly doesn’t care about your feelings and so he doesn’t even bother himself to search outside of your social circle. I can’t forgive someone that would cheat on me with my own sister or friend.I would not want this guy around at all. While you are having fun at the family Christmas party, he is checking out all your cousins and friends. This one is mean and did not stop to think that the worst possible thing to do when you cheat on a girl, is to cheat with someone who she is super close to. This is not cool at all and I will not forgive this one
  2. The chronic cheater- well what can I say, cheated once shame on you, cheated twice shame on me? No, shame on you still! I decided to give you a second chance and you threw it in my face. Shame on you for being such a hypocrite and not realizing what a treasured gem I was! This is the type that cheats out of habit; he probably can’t stop doing it even if his life depended on it. You will shed so many tears until you come to realize that it is not worth it. Twice is enough to raise a red flag.
  3. No-remorse cheater- Yes! The brutal one. That one who shows no regrets and blames you for his actions. He acts so casual about it and you will never hear him say “I’m sorry.” And if he miraculously does say sorry, it sounds more like “I am sorry I got caught,” And that is all there is. There is nothing sincere about this guy and he is a hypocrite. It is as almost as though he was proud of what he had done and given the chance he would probably do it over and over again. Well I would give him a round of applause and stroke his ego all the way out the door.
  4. The perfect cheater – the one that is too sleek and smooth in his ways that he never gives you any reason to doubt. Always home on time, leaves you with his phone, lets you answer it for that matter! Invites you to come with when he gets invited to office cheat 3parties and stuff. You will be their praising your faithful man when all you got is a sly and cunning son of a gun.  This is one deadly human being. This means he has perfected the art of lying to your face! God knows the awful truths that you will most likely never know. If you ever somehow manage to catch this criminal, I mean you somehow come to know that he has had his affair for some ten months….. I don’t know what you will still be waiting for.
  5. The-more-than-one-mistress-at-a-time cheater – This is the ultimate player! When you finally see his true colors, he got you wondering if you were his main lady or one of the seven side-chicks. This cheater always gets easily caught because most of the time he can’t even say your name   cheat 1  on the phone for some reason, he calls you by a different name or he will forget your name altogether. Do not trust a guy that has a strangely huge number of female relatives with five or six middle names each. Yes, he can apologize when he gets caught and he will show and prove to you that he has broken it off with all four of them but the question is….are you certain they were just four?

So there you have it, LadyChi’s list

To ladies whom have been cheated on, sorry about that. Life sucks sometimes but you have a decision to make at the end of it all, keep or ditch. Hope you choose well. It is totally understandable if you never want to see the guy again because betrayal hurts. But remember to forgive and let him and all that hurt go. If you are the cheater! Well I am sure you have your reasons but it’s still shameful and I would not encourage it. If you want to be with someone else then just say so. It is not worth it breaking someone’s trust and lying to them. In my part, the top half guys may be worth forgiving and most likely will never repeat the mistake again. Although it might also be that it was not your fate and you may choose to walk away. But the bottom half!!! I find more deadly but… in very *special* situations you may choose to forgive them…Everyone’s decision is their own…the above is just what LadyChi thinks….Leave me a comment on what you think….

cheat 4

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